CONDITIONAL

C3 O1 N1 D2 I1 T1 I1 O1 N1 A1 L1 - Double letter, double letter, double letter score, 18 points

I remember hearing a long time ago that young girls have babies because they are looking for someone to love them unconditionally. After having Princess Leapfrog, I can overstand what they mean.

Early in the morning when she wakes me up for her 4 am feeding, she does so by giving this pitiful sounding whimper that escalates into a blood curdling wail. Then, after I put my glasses on so I can see, I sit up a little bit and look over at her. After a few calming words, she catches her breath and her cries turn into the most heartwarming giggle ever.

This is, however, wake up number three of the night. She is still trying to learn how to sleep throughout the night and since she can't sleep 8 hours, I can't sleep eight hours. I end up sleeping when I can because when she finally does go to sleep, that's when I do my cleaning up and preparing for the next day. Then I get to fall asleep at about 12.30 am...right before her 2 am wake up call.

Princess Leapfrog when she wants that damn bottle, fighting mad and shit...:

Then there are times when she is in her bassinet so I can attempt to clean and she's fine for a while, watching Tigger, Piglet, and Eeyore spin around over her head. Eventually she gets tired of that, frowns up, and starts screaming. As soon as she sees me standing over her, she calms down stops kicking (yeah, her other nickname since the womb is Little Pele) and she reaches out for me. I pick her up and she just balls up in my arms and tucks her head in her comfort zone right underneath my chin; cooing all the time.

The Princess when she's calm and with Pooh's buddies:

This is probably because I spoiled her, but if I try to put her down there is no calming her for some time after I pick her up again. So, because she sounds so pitiful, I have to hold her, rock her, walk her, sing to her, talk to her, and play with her. Do I mind? No. But this episode prevents me from doing my chores and getting enough sleep (see above).

This is who I should have named her after:

Feeding time is beautiful as well. Whether I breast or bottle fed, she always found a way to connect to me. While I was either holding my breast or the bottle, she always found a way to grab my finger and squeeze it while she was eating. occasionally she would look up at me with these coal colored eyes of hers and close them slowly, knowing she was in good hands.

Now that Im strictly a bottle/formula feeder, that shit is EXPENSIVE. Formula is damn near $20 a can, rice/oatmeal cereal is two bucks a box (and that's at Walmart, the cheapest place in the free world). You figure she goes through two to three boxes of cereal a month (for now) and about ten cans of formula (for now)...I'm out damn near $200 a month on HER food alone.

Princess Leapfrog's love for me is unconditional and I wouldn't trade that now for anything in the world. BUT --> I am 32 years old, have a bachelor's degree, 18 years of work experience under my belt, and can pretty much ask for my pay; unlike these girls out here who are looking for unconditional love.

Hopefully they will understand that everything, even unconditional love, does come with conditions.